can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
