this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
