Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize
