just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Houston, we have a blender
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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