no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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