Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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