I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
