You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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