No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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