We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
