this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
