you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
