just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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