you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
