if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
