I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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