yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
