My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I look excited, but its just a facade.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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