If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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