I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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