How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
