I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize