Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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