i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
