Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Everything about him screamed your future.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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