Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
