Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
