Midget sex pt 2 tonight
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
