his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
