If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
