my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Randomize
