quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
As shirtless as possible
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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