Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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