we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
