Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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