The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
