But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
