Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
