I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I need water and some morals
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
where are my eyebrows?
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