ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
