North Korea, Best Korea!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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