Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
The uberlube is also flammable
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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