bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
