When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
