Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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