..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize