I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
