I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
