yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
