i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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